Life Quest

I am very happy to say I am going to the Keys i leave tomarry..I can not waite...So life seems to be looking up for me latley...I have a wonderfull man in my life now we have been daiting for 2 months now and he is a lot of fun...He allso has two girls that live with hem they are very sweet girls..I enjoy are time together..We spend hours laying together and just talking I can honstly say i am happy for the frist time in a while...I allso got a new car for Chirsmas so i have wheels now how cool is that..My kids are doing well allso and the judge says they can come home in 3 months which is after i complte this parinting class so things seem to be doing better well i have to run i miss all of you at club mills
Priscilla

Current Mood: busy

Hey all i am haveing a big party tonight sorry no worring last min plans eny one want to call me 494 71 38

Dear Santa... Dear Santa, This year I've been busy! In February I stole kingofgoons's purse (-30 points). In June I turned cptinramius in for farting in church (3 points). In November I put money in an_cat_dubh's expired parking meter (14 points). Last Sunday vicariance and I donated clothes to the needy (11 points). Last Wednesday I punched ctzanderman in the arm (-10 points). Overall, I've been naughty (-12 points). For Christmas I deserve a moldy sandwich! Sincerely, fragglov

Current Mood: curious

Hello,
I just wanted to say i miss all of you at club mills...And am sorry to say i cant come on thursday witch is tomorrow I have become ill and need to rest..however i will miss you all and I will try aging next week....

Current Mood: sick

Whats up yo???

What a night i had forgotten the hell of working all night it sucks..I just got home and am so tierd but need to wind down before bed...Just wanted to say hi and that i miss all of you...Oh and sorry about the mom thing i just needed a ride wont bring her again....Thank you all for being nice

Current Mood: tired

Today was a long and boring day...No customers...nothing to do...LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA..I NEED SOMETHING TO DO

Current Mood: bored

I just wanted to say..It is so sweet to have the bliss inside when you are with friends new our old

Current Mood: accomplished

I applied for Active duty in the army....I am in high hopes i will get inn..

Current Mood: anxious

1. Men are like ....Laxatives ..... They irritate the $hit out of you.
2. Men are like .......Bananas ...... The older they get, the less firm
they are.
3. Men are like ......Weather ..... Nothing can be done to change them.
4. Men are like .....Blenders .... You need one, but you're not quite sure
why.
5. Men are like ....Chocolate Bars .. Sweet, smooth, & they usually head
right for your hips.
6. Men are like ...Commercials ...... You can't believe a word they say.
7. Men are like ..Department Stores .... Their clothes are always 1/2 off.
8. Men are like ........Government Bonds .... They take soooooooo long to
mature.
9. Men are like ....Mascara ..... They usually run at the first sign of
emotion.
10. Men are like ......Popcorn ..... They satisfy you, but only for a
little while.
11. Men are like .... Snowstorms ... You never know when they're coming,
how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.
12. Men are like .....Lava Lamps ... Fun to look at, but not very bright.
13. Men are like ....Parking Spots ....... All the good ones are taken, the
rest are handicapped.

Current Mood: amused

The name "balefire" probably comes either from the Celtic word bel, meaning "bright," or from the Anglo-Saxon bael, meaning "a fire."

In the seventh and eight centuries, Chirstian synods attempted to ban celebratory balefires as pagan. The sixty-fifth canon of the third council of Constan tinople (680 CE) said, "Those fires that are kindled by certain people on new moons before their shops and houses, over which also they use ridiculously and foolishly to leap, by a certain ancient custom, we command them from henceforth to cease." The " ancient custom" referred to was that of dancing aroundand leaping over the balefire that were lit to celebrate the old pagan festivals. These fires would be lit on hilltops across Britain and much of Europe. Theycould be seen at each great sabbat festivals of the OLD Religion.

All domestic fires were extinguished on the day before the festival day. The Balefires, or "need-fires," would than be lit at the rising of the moon, on that festilval eve. The celebrations took place, with participants dancing sunwise, or deosil, around the flames. Some couples would take hands and leap over the flames, to promote fertility. Sometimes there were two fires, and cattle and flocks os sheep would be driven between the two, again to promote fertility.

Ovid mentions ( in fasti ) leaping over the fires taking place at the Palilia, the Feast of Pales, the shepherd's goddess of Romans. Evidence presented at the tral of Jonet Watson, of Dalkeith, Scotland, in 1661, refers to a meeting of Witches that took place "about the time of the last Balefire night."

Just before the next moon rise, and before the Balefire was extinguished, fire from it would be carried off to rekindle the domestic fires. The ashes of the fire were treated as sacred, and used in amulets, Charms and spells, and also in divination. Divination would also take place using the flames while the fire was burning.

Frazer states that there are two schools of thought concerning Balefires. One School that these fire ceremonies were in the nature of imitative magic, to ensure a needed supply of sunshine "for men, animals and plants by kindling fires witch mimic the great source of light and heat in the sky." on the other hand, he says, it has been said that the fires do not refer to the sun but are "simply purifiaction," designed to destroy all harmful influences.

In the village of Whalton, Northumberland, England, the Baal Fire is still in evidence on Old Midsummer's Eve ( July 4th ). it is said to date "from time immemorial." Traditionally a cart full of gorse and other fuel, pulled by two horses, was brought in as far as the village boundary. From there it had to be carried by hand, accompanied by much shouting and the blowing of horns. Local landowners contributed beer and food to the festivities.

Today's witches follow the treditional rituals, including pouring libations onto the flames as offerings to the gods, divining in the flames, and often throwing into the fire pieces of papper on witch they have written wishes, prayers, or lists of things they wish to be rid of..

In Britain especially, the word Bonfire is now used more than Balefire. Possibly this derives from the French word bon, meaning good or excellent, or from "boonfire" a fire at witch one might receive a boon, or a gift..

just some thing i found to be very neat i love learing about pagan manly beacouse i am mostly pagan hope you all enjoy..
Priscilla

Current Mood: blah

I actually Had a very nice time at thursday night dinner Yo..I left a bit earlier than usually..And oh my god on my way home i made the chose to walk university..and get invited to a party which i went too very cool party where we played beer pong most of the night.. got home to deal with shit but the night was worth it from hanging out with friends to going where i knew no one and making new friends... ok now a hole new idea me and Alex was talking and thought it would be fun if every one that was not attending the show all hung out tomorrow night so let me know if any one is up to hanging out
Priscilla

Current Mood: chipper

I had yet another lie free day..Am i getting better our just sleeping more? I am going to start dragging my ass out of bed earlier..i can not wait until tomorrow i get to go and spend some much needed time with my kids..I miss those little people so much..I made them some things to take with me so i hope they like them...Today was very weird i when on a walk but other than that i was lazy lazy as can be..I need to have more fun but for now that must waite..I will also be looking for a halloween costume soon any ideas?? I think i will be a belle dancer.ok off to watch tv with jen its so nice having a girl around ..
Priscilla

Current Mood: content

Wow, I could barley watch this movie..I have not even watched the end but they are in a pit with what i guess are zombies..It did however have some funny parts to it...At this one point i had to put my hand over my eyes..Because this BITCH was cutting off this dudes scalp oh my god...So should i watch the end???
Priscilla

Current Mood: contemplative

Well today was good over all..I cleaned hi tides for some much needed cash..i also got a much needed piece, and our new roommate has arrived..Jen is her name ,and over all seems like a easy going person..We bullshitted a bit and came to terms that we would be sharing a room..Weird i know but better than a couch..so i go to my new job at 9:30am i hope it is not too bad..I have heard the boss is hard to work with..Well i am going to watch some much earned tv and off to bed with me early start need lots of sleep..
Love Priscilla

Current Mood: anxious

i have had many conversations with people that believe in god, with the intention to understand why. out of all the people that i have spoken to about it only one man truly made sense to me... a charasmatic older black man that worked with me..
to know him you would see that he is fundamentally a good person and lighthearted... just a nice guy.... when i asked him why he believed in god so much he responded as follows "have you ever been in love? i answered yes. then he said that was no different than believing in god.. that confused me to say the least.... but then he pointed out what beleiving in god and being in love have in common....you cant see love, you also cannot see god....yet you acknowledge that love exists just as easily as your eyes tell you that i am standing in front of you.... by your own atheistic point of veiw that would make you insane....
you cant see it so it doesnt exist....but you believe in love so you contradict yourself fundamentally.... if you have the capacity to believe in love it is no different than believing in god.....that opened me up a little but that doesnt mean that i plan on attending any tent revivals any time soon.... i still believe that people have the capacity to know right from wrong.... once they have learned the basics of that religion does not have to be involved anymore and it can just be a hightened state of awareness.... too many people get caught up in god.... and allow themselves to be swallowed up in the showbusiness of church and religion which is really just a system of governing people teaching them thier abc's of life so that they will not destroy each other....but i will say this.... if it gives you comfort you believe in god...if it gives you comfort where in life that kind of spiritual complacentness is hard to find then go ahead.... i only urge you to expand your mind and allow it to evolve beyond an ancient system that was intended to stop chaos and get people to act in harmony with each other......
free your mind, your ass will follow.
Priscilla

Current Mood: awake

Wow,

i feel better today than i have in so long.  So many people in my life have given up so much only to be hurt or extremely dissapointed.  But yet, saw something inside of me that i could never see.  and i think i might see a glimpse of what they see.  let me explain.  recently i got into a situation where i had to call an ex boyfreind who is now a very good friend and ask him if i could move back in for a while.  reluctently he said yes.  tonight i listened to a message from a girl he works with wanting a favor.  only to later hear that the favor was for her to move in.  she had gotten into some trouble, and needed a place to stay.  not knowing at the time she was in a very similar situation as me.  i laughed where she could hear it while she was on the phone and then continued doing what i was doing.  after jj telling her she could not stay here a power unknown to me started pulling at my heart.  a power i could not ignore.  and i knew in some little way i had to give up my room to give back a bit of what everyone in my life has given me.  and with tearfilled eyes, somehow after about 15 minutes of talking i talked jj into lettin her move in.  jj has known me for some time and he could tell that i was being genuine about wanting to help another person, and that is why he changed his mind.  so in some tiny way i feel like a better person.  and for the first time i see a change in myself that gives me the hope to keep fighting for my life back. 

with great love,

Priscilla

Current Mood: peaceful

Dear Journal,
I finely got the never up to call Carolyn she is my-Family Care Supervisor..her job is to make sure i am doing the things that need to be done in order to get my kids back..So i told her i had moved again she was not at all happy with this new news..She says to meI have to get and keep a stable home and employment for 2 months before they will even think about given them back..but more like six.I have to go and see her on tuesday at 1:00pm and we are going to make my goals than..I have to say i am very disappointed to hear it will take so long to happen but i know i made this bed now i must lie in it our stand up and fix it..If a mother ever asked me for parenting advise I would tell them to not miss one min..of there child's life because you cant make up lost time you cant always win your child back..But even in my disappointment i will not give up this fight i am fighting for my life because my kids are my life and i have been lost with out them.
Priscilla

Dear journal,
I have not been very grown up in my 24 years..I was laying in bed last night feeling bad because i miss my kids so much..But yet have let them down so many times..Even though i miss them it did not seem Enough i still expect other people to fix my problems..Well i made the choice that I need to grow up and complete my own quest in life so this is day one i went to get a job..And now want to work on some more really big goals I for the first time in life believe in my love for my children and that will pull me through and hopefully i can put that passion to work...I will make a goal list today and post it tomorrow Goodbye for now...wish me luck
Priscilla,